i feel like me and cj are at a bad point in time with our relationship.
i feel like he doesn't really care all that much for my feelings,
and that just makes me think that he really doesnt love me.
how can i be so sure about something one day and then be so confused about it
the day after? i don't know if what we need is a break because i honeslty think that
if we have a "break", im not going to come back to him...
i feel like i deserve more. i feel like i deserve someone who wont betray the trust i have for them,
or at least someone who doesnt betray that trust and not even apologize and realize you've done wrong
and you've hurt me...
that's the biggest problem in our relationship.
another thingt is how he doesnt listen to me or make an effort.
i try to talk to him about something, important or not,
and he acts like a 5 year old. he hears me but he's not actually listening.
why won't he actually make an effort for me anymore??
because he's gotten lazy in this relationship, because hes bored of me, because im not that important?
i thought that when you love somebody, their feelings are just as equal to your own..
and thats not the way he treats me.
i really am afraid of what wil happen to our relationship when i walk out that door.
it will most likely be for good after i see and remember how less stresful it was without him with me.
And what really puzzles me is...
WHY THE FUCK AM I THE ONE WHO HAS TO TRY AND BUILD THAT TRUST BACK UP...WHEN HE IS THE ONE WHO KNOCKED IT DOWN...?
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You do deserve better - loads better. Any man who doesn't appreciate, listen to, or respect you isn't worth the time or the energy. You're beautiful, young, insightful - you deserve so much more. And you're right - there's absolutely no reason you should be the one mending the relationship when he's the one who's been poisoning it in the first place. Go with your intuition.
ReplyDeletei just don't think i have the strength to just stop and forget everything :/
ReplyDeletethank you so much for your words.
omg i going through the same thing. Someone cheating on you is the worst feeling in the world, you may as well be shot down there.
ReplyDeleteMine doesn't even acknowledge it and didnt even have any sort of apolozy til the other week. Even then i dont think he meant it.
I'm close to that door but something always stops me:(
Its called LOVE.
EXACLY. why do people force them selves to put with sich bullshit from others!!! Sometimes I wish I could control who the love i feel for him..
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